About Discord

[luchitrox__]

Honestly, I love Discord, because there I found my first ever online friends. They had their own dramas n stuff of course, but after all they are my only friends and the only ones that actually understand me... Plus, I met my best friend on Discord, so I don't think I will leave it soon :c

This page is cool too, but it's kind of weird to login everyday here, honestly. I also want to have friends here, but unfortunately the only way I feel comfortable is with Discord, sorry for that :cI'm not telling anyone to stop using it, just use it in moderation like anything else (so not like me).

Yeah, I understand that, don't worry It's not like I depend entirely on Discord anyways

[unigarden]

If I'm being honest, and I don't know if anyone will agree with me, most public servers are just groups of people who are bad company, or simply unpleasant to be around.

Ironically, the servers where you actually feel comfortable and enjoy chatting are often the hardest to join. Let me explain: servers that you can only join through an invitation or by knowing someone tend to have a better atmosphere, since random people can't just wander in.

I used to be in a lot of public servers, but around two years ago, I left almost all of them (with a few exceptions). Now I only stay in a few private ones (two or three) where you need to be invited to join. And honestly, that's a good thing. Toxic or unpleasant people rarely make it into closed spaces, and if someone turns out to be a problem, they're usually removed quickly.

I've always had a hard time with public Discord servers. They're far too easy to access, and since Discord is so user-friendly, it attracts everyone ; including the worst types of people.

I've been on Discord since 2016, and I've learned that talking to everyone isn't the right thing to do. Just use Discord as a way to send messages to people you know well or already know. Don't force yourself to talk to people who make you uncomfortable.

[Daniele63]

If I'm being honest, and I don't know if anyone will agree with me, most public servers are just groups of people who are bad company, or simply unpleasant to be around.
Let me explain:
I used to be in a lot of public servers, but around two years ago, I left almost all of them (with a few exceptions). Now I only stay in a few private ones (two or three) where you need to be invited to join. And honestly, that's a good thing. Toxic or unpleasant people rarely make it into closed spaces, and if someone turns out to be a problem, they're usually removed quickly.

I've been on Discord since 2016, and I've learned that talking to everyone isn't the right thing to do. Just use Discord as a way to send messages to people you know well or already know. Don't force yourself to talk to people who make you uncomfortable.

Yes, you're totally right, I was talking to everyone and it was overwhelming me, I'm now being more careful now about what interactions I have. As you said, public servers attract bad people, that's very true, choosing the right communities is very important.

[unigarden]

Absolutely. And you made the right decision. For most people, the first step is often complicated, especially when it comes to saying no or cutting ties with someone, even if they are bad for you. And that's normal, it's human nature. But the right community (and this also applies to meeting new people) is very hard to find, but once you find it, you feel really good there. But it's not something you find after staying on a server or something else for only a few days.

If I had to add anything else, it would be to simply talk to people who share your passions. Public Discord servers don't really have themes or topics of conversation. So anyone can join, but the people on them don't necessarily have anything to talk about that you're really passionate about.

In fact, forums were often about specific topics (from what I remember, I don't want to talk nonsense). There was a whole community focused on a topic they loved. There were forums on technology, forums on current events, forums on specific topics, and that's what made people enjoy talking on them and feel good. Discord hasn't been able to do that. Except for certain servers on specific topics. Discord's community servers are empty of topics.

Someone already mentioned this in the thread, but Discord is not a forum. This means that people behave very differently from how they might on forums. But I think that if Discord added a registration system for each server, perhaps people would be less inclined to come and do whatever they want or talk however they want.

[rnottelovesowls]

In fact, forums were often about specific topics (from what I remember, I don't want to talk nonsense). There was a whole community focused on a topic they loved. There were forums on technology, forums on current events, forums on specific topics, and that's what made people enjoy talking on them and feel good. Discord hasn't been able to do that. Except for certain servers on specific topics. Discord's community servers are empty of topics.

yeah, very true. and having different channels for different topics doesn’t fix that. from my own experience, people always end up diverting from what the channel topic is. i love the friends i’ve made on discord, but i’ve never truly felt like i belonged with them. idk, it’s complicated

[unigarden]

In fact, forums were often about specific topics (from what I remember, I don't want to talk nonsense). There was a whole community focused on a topic they loved. There were forums on technology, forums on current events, forums on specific topics, and that's what made people enjoy talking on them and feel good. Discord hasn't been able to do that. Except for certain servers on specific topics. Discord's community servers are empty of topics.
yeah, very true. and having different channels for different topics doesn’t fix that. from my own experience, people always end up diverting from what the channel topic is. i love the friends i’ve made on discord, but i’ve never truly felt like i belonged with them. idk, it’s complicated

It's always very difficult to have a group of friends with whom you feel really comfortable. Maybe things will work themselves out over time and you'll feel better. Or maybe you'll feel less close to them as time goes by.

In fact, it can depend on lots of things. If you go your separate ways, there will inevitably come a time when you're not as close as you used to be.

If the group of friends was already formed before, that could be another reason. From a social point of view, it has always been very difficult for people to feel comfortable or fit into a group of friends that is already formed, or with someone who already has friends. They have inside jokes and know each other very well. (I may be straying a little from the main topic.)

But it's not all bad. Maybe it's in this group of friends that you'll meet someone with whom you'll share the best moments of your life. Why not a future girlfriend/boyfriend or your best friend? But of course, if one day you really don't feel comfortable, just leave the group. And if that's really complicated, just talk less and less, and it will happen on its own.

[rnottelovesowls]

weird to think, but ever since i joined this forum, i’ve actually become less and less incentivized to open instagram, and discord became a lot less enjoyable to open and scroll through. i consider that a win. we should start recommending forums to people looking for a social media “detox”

[unigarden]

weird to think, but ever since i joined this forum, i’ve actually become less and less incentivized to open instagram, and discord became a lot less enjoyable to open and scroll through. i consider that a win. we should start recommending forums to people looking for a social media “detox”

Unfortunately, I can't think of any good instant messaging apps that allow me to chat directly with a group of friends and that are available on computers, phones, and other devices.

[lakes]

weird to think, but ever since i joined this forum, i’ve actually become less and less incentivized to open instagram, and discord became a lot less enjoyable to open and scroll through. i consider that a win. we should start recommending forums to people looking for a social media “detox”Unfortunately, I can't think of any good instant messaging apps that allow me to chat directly with a group of friends and that are available on computers, phones, and other devices.

I use Signal and Whatsapp for people I know offline, which have both desktop and mobile apps. But they require a phone number & Whatsapp is owned by Meta  

[unigarden]

Unfortunately, I can't think of any good instant messaging apps that allow me to chat directly with a group of friends and that are available on computers, phones, and other devices.
I use Signal and Whatsapp for people I know offline, which have both desktop and mobile apps. But they require a phone number & Whatsapp is owned by Meta  

I don't know anyone who uses Signal among the people I know, haha. I've read things saying that it's good, but that it does require a phone number yeah...  

But oh my god, WhatsApp.. I must have my whole family on it. I had to create an account (I didn't really have a choice). I really didn't like the WhatsApp experience . I'm not a big fan of anything Meta owns... Honestly, I don't know how my whole family manages to stay on WhatsApp... I guess it's easy for them to access?